New Dimensions?

Good Morning Everyone!

Coming to you live from an elegant universe where it would take 26 dimensions for our theories to work. Just imagine what would happen if one of those strings were misplaced. Would the balance of the universe be run off kilter? Would hot snow fall up? A definite answer would be that our favorite sweater would no longer be fashionable as the string, now misplaced, will eventually create a holel: a hole so infinitesimally small yet so overwhelming in our mind that we would store the sweater into the deepest realms of our closets; stuffed into the blackest corner, never to be seen by our eyes again. Now imagine what would happen if that misplace string were placed into another dimension, then what would become of our sweater? Would two different sweaters exist: one with a hole and one slightly thicker in overall feel? Or perhaps, there would only be one sweater; though the string can move from dimension to dimension, we can’t. So, we’ll never know what’s on the other side.

And on the other side, my Nintendo 3DS is black. For me, probably the most anticipated piece of technology besides earbuds that can last more than one year. Now, I’ve been asked before “why are you so enthralled by the 3DS, after all, real-life is already 3D?” Speechless then as I am now, I have no answers to that once posed question. All that I do know is that on a first run, I thoroughly enjoy my new piece of technology. 

Hot thing, barely 21
Hot thing, looking 4 big fun
Hot thing, what’s your fantasy?
Do U wanna play with me?

Hot thing, baby U dance so good
Hot thing, baby I knew U would
Hot thing, tell me what U see
Hot thing, When U smile, when U smile, when U smile
Are your smiles, are your smiles 4 me?

The Box:

For something so small, the box is rather big.  Did you see that? On the backside of the box? We’ve been taken to a new dimension! 3D. Hahaha! I’ve never been there before. But it’s not the box that counts, it’s the gold inside.

The Un-Boxing:

Yes! Just like opening a treasure chest recovered from the bluest to blackest to strangely clearest depths of the mid-Atlantic we find bubbles and a small sense of despair and unsatisfaction. Not to say that manuals are a bad thing. When things get hectic it’s nice to have something other than Google to turn to. Plus we find a pamphlet on Mii Plaza, our 6 AR cards for the pre-installed gaming software, a “Join Club Nintendo” snipet with registration key code (yeah…platinum plus membership like a boss). If you scratch underneath the surface (where’s does your purpose lie?), you’ll find exactly 3 segmented areas: charging station, the goods, the AC power adapter all nicely wrapped in their individual sleeves like comic books wrapped in mylar never to be opened to fresh air ever again because it’s about the preservation and collectibility, not the reading and enjoyment.

The Goods:

Simple enough, we have the power source and we have the console itself. It’s so shiny, as shiny as a mother’s love when her first child comes home from their first day of school and she asks “what did you learn today?” and the child with glee answers “recess!” I’ve noticed that Cosmos black is not the same as black or Wii black or black as day: there is a little color blending going on from light to dark, similar to sky to earth, but grey with a little black. It’s still sexy.

The Charging:

Yup! It’s true it takes 3 hours of charging before use. Out of the box not as long. But patience is the key to everything, just like Walt from Gran Torino. So while you wait; you can make a grilled cheese sandwich and 2 tacos, Wii it out for a bit, or maybe for once pretend that the Nintendo is not the called the No-Friendo and chat it up with friends and family.

Oh baby don’t it feel like heaven right now
Don’t it feel like something from a dream
Yeah I’ve never known nothing quite like this
Don’t it feel like tonight might never be again
Baby we know better than to try and pretend
No one coulda ever told me ’bout this
I said yeah yeah

The waiting is the hardest part
Every day you see one more card
You take it on faith, you take it to the heart
The waiting is the hardest part

 It’s On:

Before the excitment begins, you need to set up the 3D experience just like the countdown for flicks shown on an IMAX screen or the THX sound check. Smiling like a school boy when he figures out what good is, I was already hooked on the device from the set up. It’s so real. I can touch it (fingers pinching at nothing).

Once the date, language, parental controls (which is a nice feature actually) and the like are set you finally reach the home page. The first item on the menu is the “Health and Safety Information.” I didn’t read this, but I probably should have. After my first 1 hour of playing with the 3D settings, I just had to fall alseep. So, the visuals will take time to get used to. The first ride is always a little rough. Ha!

The second menu item would be the game card slot. Seeing as to how Nintendo didn’t have much usual Nintendo-released games on the release date, I settled for a close second: I love Romance of the Three Kingdoms, Ninja Gaiden, Dynasty Warriors, Tecmo Bowl, so why wouldn’t I like Koei/Tecmo-released Samurai Warriors? Talk about a beautiful opening with the cherry blossoms and wind and fire and such. And did I mention flying bullets? I’ll admit, this was the reason why I had to sleep-off my first hour of play…it was just too much to handle at once…I’m new, I’m new I don’t know what to do. Nonetheless, the game told me that I “have the spirit of a clown, bringing joy and laughter to the world.” Sexy! Let’s smile and laught together shall we?

The 3rd option is probably my favorite thus far (until more games come out): the 3DS camera. Back in the day Marvel Comics released trading cards, and in Marvel Universe Series 4 set one of the chase cards was a 3D-esque hologram of Spider-Man versus Venom. The pictures taken with the 3DS have the same look of that Marvel hologram without the crappy gold color. It was having some fun with the Magic Kingdom! I can almost touch Mickey!

The 4th menu item is the 3DS sound. Not sure how I will be using this feature, but I changed the menu bar colors to purple, because I make it funky. All that I have to do now if figure out how to nicely record Fever, Chill, some P-Funk, Prince and James Brown on the thing, then I’ll be in business.

Next up are my Mii and my Mii Peeps (aka Mii Plaza)! I made my Mii…tall, dark and sexy. Haha! But my head is a little big. You also have the option of creating a Mii based on the 3D image taken from the 3DS. For some unexplanable reason, the Mii’s generated when I did this made me look like Sleepy the dwarf.

Then we have 2 factory-installed games AR Games and Face Raiders. For AR Games you need the AR cards. By having the 3DS recognize the cards, teh software makes a game out of the affair. It’s actually pretty exciting. Face Raiders has a similar effect, but instead of cards, you take a picture of people or items and the software makes flying faces of the item captured. And you get to show how much love you have for the item by shooting at several variants of it. They kiss you if they get too close. Ha! So it’s all about the love!

When the fun is all but had, said and done, we finish off with the Activity Log, Download Play and Settings buttons. Where you can monitor your actions, monitor other people’s actions and establish rules for monitoring your and other people’s actions.

In the end, I enjoyed and am still enjoying the initial stages of romance with my 3DS. Much like the rest of you, I’m waiting for the core Nintendo games to be released. Hopefully, it will not end in bitter divorce. Of course it won’t! That is until the Nintendo 4DS comes out. Hahahaha!  But until then I’m having my fun. To conclude, if you like beautiful graphics or have an affinity for the visual arts, I suggest that you check out a 3DS for yourself.

I imagine myself inside your bedroom
Oh I imagine myself in your sky
(U) U are the reason there’s bass in my boom
(Oh u) U are the reason I’m high

If u and I were just ten feet closer
Then i’d make u understand
That everything i wanna do 2 your body, baby
I would do 2 your head
Then u’d be hip 2 the deep rush
Deeper than the boom of the bass
With every other flick of the pink plush
The closer we get 2 the space (The closer we get 2 the space)

Don’t u want 2 go? (The space)
Where the souls go (The space)
Where the tears flow (The space)
Where the love grows
Do u want 2 go?

Thank you for reading! Until the next, this is your host signing off.

I don’t want real-life…I want 3D!

Good Morning Everyone!

Coming to you live from I-5. So, the Nintendo 3DS was released and you can find them in stores now. I pre-ordered mine before preordering was cool. Unfortunately for me, I will not get mine until Thursday night. But until then, let’s spend the next 3 or 4 days talking Nintendo. The only Nintendo gaming systems that my family and I have owned were the the original NES, the Gamecube, I gots the Wii, the original GameBoy, GameBoy Color and the Nintedo DS Lite. 4 systems in 4 days. Let’s rant:

I am not a gamer, but I do play video games. When we got our NES, we got the Deluxe Set that came with the zapper,  R.O.B. the robot, Gyromite/Stack-Up and Duck Hunt. With those two games, we also got Seicross and Tiger Heli. Gyromite and Stack-Up took away too much time just to set-up (thank you R.O.B.) so they didn’t get much play. Duck Hunt was cute until that dog became annoying…which was quick.

Seicross made us hate rocks and Tiger Heli (much like Seicross) just kept on going…forever. But those were the classics. We didn’t have Super Mario Bros. or Super Mario Bros 2. In fact our first Mario game was Super Mario Bros. 3 (the best NES game ever). Our second NES Mario game was Dr. Mario, which has the best soundtrack ever (screw other opinions…Fever and Chill are banging).

Mike Tyson’s Punch Out was an instant play-all-day game. I remember not eating the night the game was bought, because we just got past Glass Joe and we were trying to figure how to beat Von Kaiser. I’ll admit it, I was knocked-down by Glass Joe at first…I was slow. King Hippo took awhile. Stupid Bald Bull “bull charge.” But I did TKO Mike in the 1st round once in my life instead of the round3 decision.

I skipped school just to play Double-Dragon II…I’m a master of the super-knee kick thing. Make them fly! Chicago Bears in Tecmo Bowl. Walter Payton running forever. Mike Singletary getting the sacks. Going long to Willie Gault. Returning everything with Gentry. We can easily rack up 200 points on the Redskins or Cowboys.

We never flipped Metal Gear…we don’t know how to destroy the Super Computer. Let’s not talk about Ninja Gaiden. WTF? Punching dogs to death! Hiding in a box! Okay that’s actually pretty neat…but still damn game. How does Snake carry all that crap? Dude is a boss! A boss that can’t even pick a lock to a locked door. Got to find that card key.

Of course we eventually got the Zelda games. They were gold…love that. Star Tropics was hot. You had to wet the map to see the code! What? Instant classic. Thanks to my dad traveling, we’ve had the pleasure of owning classics which were rare to find in the states. Burai Fighter was a beautiful game, but hard as hell. How can I play on Ace when I can barely beat the game on Eagle?

Another game brought to us from overseas was Romance of the Three Kingdoms; the NES game based on the classic Chinese novel. Thanks to this game, the novel is one of my favorites. I love the game too. Who am I playing? Of course I’m going to start off as Liu Bei. Of couse I want Guan Yu and Zhang Fei on my sqaud. I’m a winner. What? But the game is a classic whoever you chose as ruler.

As AVGN has showed us, with every good NES game, there is a stupid amount of bad games. For example, one of our worst Deja Vu. Alligator in a sewer, which we can shoot with our pistol. An endless sewer. Being mugged by the same guy. The girl in the red dress. We played this game a million times and never knew how to pass it. Who would have known to dump all of our possession in the sewer? Balls! Bad Dudes and N.A.R.C. should only be played in the arcade. But all NES games should be played.

3D in 4 days! Next time: GameBoy.